The Sunset Before the Storm

DB update:

The clouds last night were just amazing! The subtle, opposing colors caught my attention. I couldn’t look everywhere fast enough. Each tiny bit of the sky was worthy of painting, all by itself.

I also took photos of my Dragon Boy sketches in my sketchbook to print them out and ink them, for practice. It’s kind of amazing to me that my brain can create something and keep working on it, but I have to make it keep trying, each day, for a little while, or it feels impossible.

Time blindness is a real thing that ADHD artists have to struggle with, and all the videos and blogs I’ve read from the teachers at SVSlearn.com mention it. My best tips: set a timer, make a goal on an app that you can check off, and keep it to a very small daily goal. These can help me get started, then keep going on each day’s little bite of elephant.

I tend to want to do it all, and have it done, right now! But then put it off until. . . never, apparently. It’s not a moral failing of my character, I’ve learned. It’s a brain flaw, common to my set, and I just get to re-deal with it all the time, without self recrimination. Just try again, and be nice about it.

It’s funny (read: baffling!) that this project is something that I really want to work on, but I end up procrastinating it, thinking excuses like “I don’t have enough time”, “I should be doing something important-er, like whatever anyone else needs from me instead of what I want to do.” Somehow my feelings legitimize anything anyone else does as a valid pursuit, but not my own interests and talents. (Except playing video games. I definitely feel like anyone doing that is always wasting time!)

I have to tell my inner demons that ART IS NEEDED. It’s everywhere and on everything! And more is still needed. Also, I NEED TO DO ART. It’s food for the soul and it’s good for everyone to participate in creative endeavors. It’s one of those basic functions of humanity. You are allowed to do it.